My heart goes out to all those struggling with infertility and facing yet again, another set back.
The feeling is all too familiar for me. During our battle, we had moved out of state and back for work. Through all the testing, I was diagnosed with PCOS which I later found out was incorrect. Then later before I was to have surgery to remove my tubes, I got a call 4 days prior informing me that my doctor died. Yes- you heard me correctly. He died due to a heart attack the DAY AFTER we met. Such an incredible, compassionate man. RIP Dr. Brinton. 💔
The set backs were the worst part of the whole process. It felt like as soon as we took two steps forward, we soon found ourselves five steps back.
A good friend once told me, if you feel in your gut that you’re going to have a baby then you will. And while you’re facing these setbacks, give yourself permission to create a Pinterest board. Post your nursery ideas. Plan on the fun stuff.
So keep your head high. We’ll get through this setback. Together.
So we got married. Kissed and ran off into the sunset to start the rest of our lives. Bought a house. Bought a Boat. Adopted the cutest puppy dog.
And then we had a heartfelt serious moment where we felt the time was right to start building a family.
Pure silence for 6+ months and a gut feeling that felt so heavy that this was just the beginning. And then for 3 long years, a smile and congratulations for everyone else around me getting pregnant. My friends and even my brother- who had two beautiful baby girls while I fought my battle. Was I happy for them? OF COURSE. But that didn’t stop the door from smacking me in the face each time.
I know the feeling. The time will never come. Why me? Will we ever have a family? What if we don’t? What’s our plan ‘B’? How are we going to afford treatment moving forward? I don’t think I’m strong enough to go through a surgery. Needles? I’M THE WORST! How am I going to give myself shots every day?
The doubt can completely consume you. Your life may seem more like a mystery now than it ever will. But newsflash! YOU ARE STRONGER than you even know. Because when it comes down to it, you will go forward. You will do what it takes. You’ll bust down that door and make your life happen. Is it exactly what you dreamed of? No. But the silver lining is, a whole lot is going to come from this than you ever expected.
Grow from this journey. Trust in God. Keep plugging forward.
You got this.